In January, I gave a dope list of “New Year’s Resolutions that Don’t Suck.” A resolution that was missing from this list was “working out.” It’s a played out resolution because all should strive to stay somewhat active. Anyway, I stay pretty fit, it’s just that my diet includes a lot of fries and donuts. My workouts include a mix of dance, interval training, hiking and weights. What’s missing from this is yoga. The quintessential LA sport in all it’s meditative glory.
Going to be completely honest, I suck at yoga and I have tried it several times. Yet, I’m determined to become an amateur yogi. If not, at least for these fun yoga pants, gifted to me, in hopes of encouraging me to try again.
MY Top 5 REASONS TO FCKING LOVE YOGA
1. FLEXIBILITY IS SEXY
I’m as flexible as a stick. I remember when I lost my flexibility. It was in 2nd grade gymnastics, I didn’t stretch and went right into the splits. Never to go into the splits again. Well, yoga gets you flexible, it helps your joints and give you the ability to touch your toes. On top of that some yoga poses make excellent sexual positions.
2. GET THAT GOOD SLEEP
Anyone that knows me, knows that insomnia is my best friend. In fact, I’ve accepted that we’re in a long term relationship. Studies have shown that consistent Yoga leads to a more clear mind and better sleep. It will help chill out my nervous system and in return give me the good sleep I’ve been yearning for.
3. THE CLOTHES ARE CUTE AF
There is nothing that screams “cute and fit” more than Yoga clothes. These clothes have the ability to make it look like you know what you're doing. Akin to the people that wear one pants leg up in Hip Hop classes but can't hold a beat to save their lives. At least in yoga attire I'll look the part. Also, nothing sculpts your ass, quite like a good pair of yoga pants. Just make sure they sculpt it and don’t show it. I’m talking to you lovers of white sheer yoga pants. Just say no!
4. SWEATY DUDES IN CLASS
Yoga can make you a happier and more focused person. I think part of that happiness and focus is the hot guys taking the class with you. I mean, I don’t mind you doing warrior pose just take it to my bed. During the summers here in Los Angeles they have Yoga in the park, pretty much everywhere there’s a park. This leads to guys taking their shirts off to do yoga. If anything can help overcome the blood rushing to my head in an upside down pose, it’s glistening men.
5. NO MORE YOGI GLARES
In Los Angeles, you better have a favorite taco spot and yoga class. It’s what you do, you drink craft beer then you talk about the latest yoga class, you sweat in, next to Kate Hudson. Every time I mention yoga not being my thing, I regret it. If I just start getting my yoga on, I won’t receive a sales pitch on the benefits of yoga (that I already know bitches). Which last time I checked, isn’t you judging me the exact opposite of yoga's teachings.
Y’all, I’m determined to make it happen. This summer Yoga will become my bitch.
What are your takes on yoga? Love it or hate it? Comment below!